Words of Affirmation
Act of Service
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Understanding my love languages helps me understand why I do the things I do. It also helps me understand other people and the reasons behind their behaviors and actions.
My main love language has always been Words of Affirmation. It is explained as follows: Actions don't always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, "I love you," are important--hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten. You thrive on hearing kind and encouraging words that build you up.
My second love language, which I have more recently discovered is Physical Touch: Hugs, pats on the back, and thoughtful touches on the arm—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive. Appropriate and timely touches communicate warmth, safety, and love to you.
Since I was a baby, I've had a blue blanket (some of you have seen it). I didn't realize that I was trying to fulfill my "Physical Touch" needs with my blue blanket. Wrapping up in it made be feel safe and secure. I also played with the fuzzies with my fingers. I still have my blue blanket to this day. For now my blue blanket and my dog, Raya are my only consistent sources of physical touch. :)
Something we need to remember is that we all like and need ALL the love language types. But if we aren't receiving our primary love language, then the other languages won't matter and we won't feel "loved."
Quality time also means a lot to me: undivided attention from someone I love. Heartfelt gifts mean a lot to me as well. I am touched by the thoughtfulness and effort behind gifts: that they were thinking of me apart from when we are together. Acts of Service is also a big one for me.
I've noticed that the way I GIVE love is sometimes very different from the way I need to RECEIVE love. I give a lot of Acts of Service. I don't know why, but it is just what I do. I want more than anything to help people and make them happy and make their lives better. So I do whatever I can to serve them. I also give a lot of Words of Affirmation. I'm always trying to be supportive and loving with uplifting and encouraging words. I love writing notes (and receiving notes) that are uplifting and positive. I love giving meaningful gifts that have a lot of thought and effort behind them. I love spending quality time with the people I love. Not just time, but QUALITY time.